Testerosterone Withdrawal

I realize that I’m doing that whole “run away from Dudes” thing again.

It literally makes my heart ache when I think of having to interact socially with a man. I expect them to try to hurt me. Or even worse, to try to love me and then decide that they don’t want to love me anymore.

My first love did that. He built me up so grandly and really treated me like a queen. Then one day he just walked away from the throne and I spent years trying to figure out what I had done to fall from grace.

Now I realize; I ain’t do nothin. He was just dumb. I bet you if I let him come visit me he’d try to holla.

We women love to sit and analyze why men act up the way they do. Lemme tell you why.

First, men are spoiled. We give them anything they want, when they want it and they rarely are held to a higher standard so they can act how they want to act and we will still accept it because we are lonely and when you’re weak and lonely and don’t know your value, you will accept a whole bunch of BS.

Second, Most men are selfish. And most women too. Remember, we all operate at the center of our own distinct universe so while he chooses not to compromise his status as king and ruler of his universe, she may diminish her role as queen because her own universe doesn’t seem inviting. I guess my ideal situation would be to join forces with a king and expand our universe together.

Third, men are insecure. A good friend gave me this advice, “If a man tells you that he is not good enough for you…believe him.” I’ve encountered this problem on many occasions. I would meet a man who would tell me how much he’s crazy about me…but he thinks I should be with someone else. “Someone is going to make you so happy one day.” “I know you want and deserve more than I could ever give you.”

Those kind of statements were all so wild to me. The thing is, they may think that you are so great that they look at their lives and their accomplishments and they don’t feel like they are ready to be the man you will respect and follow for the rest of your lives. They want to come to the plate with something, and even though you may be the right person, their pride won’t allow them to stand beside you until they can prove their worth to you. Funny how..most often…you don’t need all that. But still…that’s why it ends.

Don’t always think it’s you.

Men are human too. Men have issues too.

Men are coo coo.

But oh so neccessary.

~going through withdrawal~