Everyone is dissappointed in me. How could you leave grad school? They shake their head or mumble facetious well wishes as they hope I’ll just “get a job”.
But I can’t just GET A JOB. I’m not one of those worker people. That has never worked for me in the past so I have to try to become an entrepreneur. I have to at least try because I don’t know what else to do.
Walking away from that and then starting my own website to try to sustain myself is more work than a full time job. Way more work. It’s having to be creative, study more, engage people more. I study more than I did when I was in school. I watch other people as they implement their business models and I imitate them. I see them in action and I am hopeful.
I have to be. I am in a corner. I have to fight my way out in order to stay alive. Behind the scenes I have no one to talk to about all this, really. They just see me sitting at home, they don’t know the hours I put in writing and creating and building. They only value hours put in working for someone else’s dream. I can’t do that anymore.
Nightly, my prayer is “Please let me better tomorrow than I was today.”
And I fight with that barometer because I don’t know what “better” is.
Not yet.
My sister makes me laugh when she says, “She quit school, just like all the other millionaires did.”
That’s true. Every risk taker I know, didn’t complete their education, they just WENT FOR IT.
I hope that magic is sprinkled on me.
Soon.
Ms. Tee I'm so excited for you…I saw your gift back in 2003! They don't know but anybody who has put the time in that you have over all these years will know that it is possible. They just don't have a dream big enough that they can believe it and make it come into fruition…Dreamers that make them reality don't allow the world to hold them hostage, they make it happen! Congrats Mama!!