I was a complete ball of energy today!
I’m so excited! Ever since I posted the story about the engagement my website has been blowing up! I had no idea how many hits I’d get from posting this story and I feel so special and grateful that God chose me to write it. Look at how much exposure my site is getting! Wow!
I try not to read it because everytime I do I find a word or sentence that I should change but since I know I’m never satisfied due to my perfectionist tendencies, I just..leave it alone. The couple called me today to discuss the story and I blessed them and they blessed me back. I know they are famous now because of the slide show but they are really regular people my age and I’m glad I could take part in their joy. I hope they become even more famous and maybe even receive some financial blessings because of how their relationship has blessed the world.
I even had to call my sister to tell her thankyou for suggesting I put the story on my own website when I didn’t hear back from any of the other publications that I tried to sell the story to. See….when doors seem to be closed, it’s not over. You’re just being redirected toward an even greater destiny.
I think about how I’m usually home by myself and I’m amazed by the fact that it doesn’t bother me at all. Imagine if I was here desperate for attention or friendship…I’d be a mess. Running behind people who don’t mean me well, just because I was afraid to be alone.
That ain’t me at all. In fact, I’ve met quite a few people here but I still don’t call any of them to hang out because I don’t like to interrupt people’s lives like that and I really don’t mind being by myself. I have extremely high standards in friendships and I won’t compromise that just to have company. If people call me, I only go if I have peace and feel positive vibrations from them.
Ya’ll wanna know something funny about me? I’m a BIG BALL of energy! If you met me, you’d probably try to pass me a blunt and tell me to calm down. I don’t know why I get like that when I’m happy but I just like to bless people and tell them how great they are and how great their lives are gonna be. Although I’m usually anti social, I am a great party hostess because I love to plan exciting games and things for people to get to know each other better. But things have to be planned because I’m moody and if I’m not in the right mood, you don’t wanna be around me.
Ya’ll..I am just so grateful to God right now. I feel like I’m so in love. I know nothing I do is seperated from Him. I’d love to meet other people who feel the same way or who at least recognize His hand in their lives.
Tonight I was feeling kinda antsy about the feelings and vibrations that lead my life. You know, how I can tell what is going on with a person without them telling me..just by the vibrations I feel when I’m around them. I can see the truth even when they are trying to hide it from me. I wish I could meet someone else who has these feelings and revelations. Is there anyone else who feels like they travel in a big ball of light? Does that sound weird?
I dug around on the net to see if I could find anything related to what I was dealing with and I came up with the term, Clairsentience.
It said: It is a form of extra-sensory perception wherein a person acquires psychic knowledge primarily by means of feeling. There are many different degrees of clairsentience ranging from the perception of diseases of other people to the thoughts or emotions of other people. The ability differs from third eye in that this kind of ability can not have a vivid picture in the mind. Instead, a very vivid feeling can form.
Another school of thought says that our “sixth sense” grows when we do spiritual practice. With regular spiritual practice done according to basic spiritual principles we increase our “spiritual level” and are able to perceive and experience the “subtle world” to greater degrees.
Maybe all of this seeking God for every little thing and following my peace has me extra sensitive to the spiritual side of things around me. I called Kim and spoke to her about it and she said, “With your faith walk, you have to have that Tee. If God is going to have you out all by yourself, He had to give you that gift so that you won’t be misled. It’s a gift to be able to feel the truth of situations when people are trying to lie or mislead you.”
It reminded me of going to that “party” with Kia in Houston and how I felt like it was wrong before we even left the house. And immediately before I entered the house party, I “heard” in my spirit, “Pray over yourself.” And I did.
Once before I was talking to one of my co workers and she showed me a picture of her husband. I immediately felt bad for her. From his picture I could just…tell that he didn’t respect her or value her the way she wanted. All I said was, “He looks like he is a handful.” She looked suprised by my assessment but I knew that it was the truth.
Well…whatever it is about me that I find to be extremely peculiar, it’s okay- someone loves it. My friends do. My kids do. God does, He made me this way.
I’m sitting in my bed. I took this bed coming to me as a sign that God wants me to stay here because I wasn’t interested in buying furniture simply because I know that when it’s time to go on to my next opportunity, I don’t want to have to deal with giving away furniture and stuff like that. I’m trying to live a minimalist lifestyle until I am certain that I can take good care of myself and I’m in a positive environment for me to grow.
People don’t get that…and I don’t really try to explain anymore. Sometimes when you’re bogged down by an extravagant lifestyle you become a slave to that lifestyle and you can’t walk away from a bad situation because you can’t imagine life without the frills.
I ain’t scared. I know that I will live extremely, RIDICULOUSLY comfortably one day but for right now, I’ll go without the big luxuries until I find my perfect place. I was satisfied to live a very basic life because I knew I needed to maintain the flexibility to run after my next opportunity if need be.
But look what happened? I didn’t ask for a bed. I wasn’t looking for one. I got one as a gift from God just as I was trying to decide if I should make another move. Now that’s a sign if I ever saw one. I do love Dallas, Texas. I want to stay and I’m thinking…maybe God wants me to stay here too. He’ll make a way, I know He will.
Miracle shall follow miracle…