Creative Wishes

My 3 year old is sick today. I missed work to take him to the doctor. He hasn’t eaten anything all day and can’t keep his fluids down. The doctor prescribed 3 different medicines.

He just threw up a few minutes ago. I wiped him down and replaced his clothes. He’s in the bed laying motionless. It looks like I’ll be missing another day of work tomorrow, which wouldn’t be so bad except I make JUST enough money to make my bills so this will be a big blow to my paycheck.

Man…I need a breakthrough. I know I’m not ungrateful but I’m already getting bored with my job. It’s routine writing and routine work and it feels like a job now.

I look around at all the people in their cubicles, typing away and trying to get promoted. I don’t want to get promoted. There is no other job there that I would like to do. I have a grand idea though. There’s a position that I’d like to have that hasn’t been created yet. I see an unfulfilled need and I have expressed a desire to fill it. My company president says we will talk about it later.

Still, after such a let down this just reconfirms that I can never do routine work for a living. And I need to be fulfilled in my work to be happy. Ofcourse I’m responsible and I won’t quit, but I’m also wasting my time and my talent. I absolutely love the company, the people I work with and my company president is HOT! But——– I have not found my place at this company yet.

And so I lift this up to God.

You gave me this amazing gift of seeing things in people and situations that no one else sees. You gave me this incredible way of expressing myself. I get excited when I get an idea and I have to start from scratch with research, planning and executing the idea. There’s got to be a happy medium in my career. I need to be able to create and inspire, feeding my expressive nature and nurturing others. At the same time I need to be able to take care of my family financially while not feeling like I’m letting my company down or taking a huge hit to my income when I have to miss a day because of my children.

I’m obedient. I’m driven. I will excel and work extra hard at any given task. I just need financial security and an outlet to be creative.

Am I asking for too much?

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