This Weekend

The weekend passed by for me in a fog.

I guess I remember waking up early Saturday morning and saying goodbye to Dude. Yeah, I know. I’m supposed to leave him alone but..err…it’s not happening. So I decided to just let things be and continue to see other people while still enjoying his company. It is what it is, man. ~shrugs~ He brings a smile to my face, why stop it when I really need it right now? We vibe lovely like that.

My boys and I got dressed and went over to Carol Mart (the same Carol Mart featured in the Rick Ross Hustlin video) to get us all haircuts. All three of us took turns in Jonathan’s chair and after watching A Thin Line Between Love & Hate at the shop, $30 later we all walked out looking fresh to death.

We rushed home for a quick snack before heading over to Dianna’s house in North Miami for a kindergarten graduation party that was off the chain. Dianna’s friend, who happens to be an old classmate of mine from highschool, spared no expense at her kids party and I was worn OUT from all the fun I had riding the train through the neighborhood, eating cotton candy and snow cones, bouncing in the bounce house. You know I had to take my turn to bounce! I lasted about 15 seconds before I was about to pass out but it was fun!

We got home close to 9pm, my boys went straight to bed and I watched Casino with Dude. Well, he fell asleep and I watched it by myself. ~grrrr~ But that movie was crazy! All the dude wanted was a ride or die chick. He wanted someone by his side in life and that chick was stuck on her ex pimp. Damn…now I see why some men are wary of trusting women.

Back to another week of begging editors to give me a shot.Being a creative person has its disadvantages, I tell ya.

I’m still kinda frazzled by my uncle’s death. I have to write his obituary since that’s what I do. I’ll get to work on it tonight, his funeral is this Saturday.

I really don’t know what to do about my life right now. All of these failures can only lead to my eventual success so I’ll just remember Tupac’s advice:

Some say tha Blacker tha berry
Tha sweeter tha juice
I say, tha darker tha flesh and tha deeper tha roots
I give a hollar to my sisters on welfare
Tupac cares, but don’t nobody else care
I know they like ta beat ya down a lot
And when ya come around tha block brothers clown a lot
But please don’t cry, dry ya eyes
Never let up
Forgive but don’t forget girl keep ya head up
And when he tells you you ain’t nothin
Don’t believe him
And if he can’t learn ta love ya, you should leave him
Cuz sister you don’t need him
I ain’t tryin ta gash up, but I just callem how I see ’em
Ya know what makes me unhappy
When brothers make babies
And leave a young mother ta be a pappy
And since we all came from a woman
Got our name from a woman
And out game from a woman
I wonder why we take from our women
Why we rape our women
Do we hate our women ?
I think it’s time ta kill for our women
Time ta heal our women
Be real to our women
And if we don’t
We’ll have a race of babies
That hate tha ladies that make tha babies
And since a man can’t make one
He has no right ta tell a woman when and where ta create one
So will tha real men get upI know your fed up ladies
But keep ya head up

Chorus
Eeewww child things are gonna get easier
Eeewww child things are gonna get brighter
Eeewww child things are gonna get easier
Eeewww child things are gonna get brighter

I remember Marvin Gay, usta sing ta me
He had me feelin like black was tha thing ta be
And suddenly tha ghetto didn’t seem so tuff
I thought we had it rough, we always had enough
I often huffed and puffed about my curfew and broke tha rules
Ran with tha local crew and had a smoke or two
And realize momma really paid tha price
She nearly gave her life, ta raise me right
And all I had ta give her was my pipe dreams
Of how i’d rock tha mic and make it to tha big screen
I’m tryin ta make a dollar out of fifteen cents
It’s hard ta be legit and still pay tha rent
And in tha end it seems i’m headin for tha penn
I try and find my friends, but they’re blowin in tha wind
Last night my buddy lost his whole family
It’s gonna take tha man in me
Ta conquer this insanity
It seems tha rain will never let up
I try ta Keep My Head Up and still keep from getting wet up
You know it’s funny when it rains it pours
They got money for wars, but can’t feed tha poor
Sad there ain’t no hope for tha youth and tha truth is
There ain’t no hope for tha future
And then they wonder why we crazy
I blame my mother, for turning my brother into a crack baby
We ain’t meant ta survive, cause it’s a setup
And even though ya fed up
Ya got ta Keep Ya Head Up