Step to the left…

Step to the left, step to the right

Spin around and bring it down tonight

Bring it on up, move in close

Let me see you and your partner stroll

 

R. Kelly ~Happy People

 

I was leaving the barber shop with my boys on Saturday afternoon when Anna calls me and tells me that her brother-in-law is having a 40th birthday party that evening and I’m welcome to come.

 

I think about it for a minute cuz I know I have to persuade Lil Redd (my mama) to watch the boys for me. I call her up and tell her I want to go out with Anna. She says she’ll think about it, which means she’ll do it so I call Anna to get the specifics.

 

She tells me it’s a Black & White party and everyone is going to be too precise so go and get fitted. I’m smiling now because Anna’s sister and her husband are pretty well off financially and I know that anything that they do is going to be BIG and lots of fun.

 

My mind starts to go through my wardrobe like a roledex.

 

Hmmmm. What do I have that is black and white and is off the chizzain? Oh yeahhh… Just last week I pulled out a dress I bought four months ago and I showed it to my mother.  A white linen dress that fits just enough to show off my curves, but not enough to reveal too much. It flows to my ankles and is nice enough to wear to church or a nice date.  I had been saving it for something special.

 

I turn my car around and my boys and I are off on a mission to find the perfect pair of shoes and some black and white accessories. 

 

It’s so hard shopping with two little rug rats. They like to run of and grab stuff and I end up having to spank my little one in the accessory store for pulling down an entire rack of scrunchies. ~sigh.

 

When we finally get home it’s almost dark and I feed the boys, dunk them in the bathtub and put them in the bed so that I can begin THE TRANSFORMATION.

 

Getting dressed to go out is almost as much fun as going out.  I hang up my dress in the bathroom so that the steam from my shower can loosen up any wrinkles and I get out my new accessories and choose what color eyeshadows I want to wear. I consider wearing some fake eyelashes, which definately make a big difference on my eyes because i have short lashes but i remember what happened the last time I wore fake lashes.  After an hour this guy came up to me and said, “Your eyelash is coming off.” How embarrassing!

 

Shower first. Lotion down. Paint my toes. Apply my make-up, being careful not to overdo the silver shadow that I chose. Eyeliner, Berry lip liner I got from Mac Cosmetics, thanks to Ruby, and Grapeful lip gloss from Mary Kay.

 

I’m sweating myself hard and I’m only wearing a t-shirt.  Dang girl u look good!

 

I call Anna to see where she is in her process.

 

“I’m leaving Overtown to come get you right now, I’ll call you when we get off the expressway,” she says.

 

Come on, you know I wasn’t going to drive myself. Anna and her boyfriend are coming to pick me up for the party. I don’t mind being the third wheel. With Anna it’s always been like that. Me, her and her boyfriend rolling deep.

 

She calls me and I slip on my dress and new shoes and I feel like I’m going to the prom. I had just gotten my hair done earlier that day and while the boys were getting haircuts I had the barber touch up my eyebrows, so I was ready to go!

 

 We drive out to Hialeah where her brother had rented a hall. I’m feeling good as i watch everyone step out of their cars wearing different variations of Black and white.

 

This crowd was not your typical club crowd. This was officially a “grown folks” party. Nowhere in the room did I see a man that I felt needed a haircut. No pants hanging off their butts. All of these guys were too precise and smiling at me like, Wazzzzuppp.

 

I tell you it really resembled that R. Kelly video. You know the one where everyone is wearing white and stepping on the dance floor.  I wanted to dance but you all know I can’t dance and I hate to be on the dnace floor and have to turn all of the guys down. I have rythm. Yes I do. But my stamina is really low. I can shake a lil something, but only for a couple of minutes. After that I get tired and want to sit down.

 

I’m getting old. 

  

 

I never had so much fun sitting down before. I sat in my seat throughout most of the party dancing and singing loud and having a good time by myself. I know, I’m such a nerd. Anna’a mom was sitting with us and she was just laughing and laughing at me.  Anna’s mom is so beautiful. And she knows it. She had the nerve to wear a dress with a peephole in the front! I just shook my head and laughed.

 

If you aren’t from Miami you ain’t gonna feel me but if you grew up round my way you know what a Miami bass beat does to you.

 

As soon as you hear that beat your butt immediately starts thumping. It’s like a heartbeat that radiates through your entire being. Looking back it all started with the song Doo Doo Brown.  Those booty shaking boys that like to get down and slang that thang get the party started like no other. There were quite a few of them there. But most of the music they were playing was old jamz that i had never even heard before. All the old people were on the dance floor, shaking their bellies and sweating their curls out.

 

There are a few hundred people at the party and more are arriving as I leave. There is a picture booth set up in the corner, lots of free food and the DJ is hot!  Anna’s family knows how to do it right! 

 

I’m home by 2:30 am and go right to sleep. My boys wake me up at 7am as usual and I try to persuade them to go back to bed. Yeah right. They want breakfast. They want to play. They want to go to the park.

 

I’m in the kitchen making their breakfast with my eyes half-closed. I know that in a little while I have to get ready to go and visit another church in pursuit of a place to fellowship and worship.

 

I haven’t given up on that. It’s a bit frustrating as I continue to visit church after church but I know one will be right for me and my sons. This church isn’t. It’s full of old people and I had been at the church for over an hour and they STILL hadn’t gotten to the WORD. I already was tired and feeling like my energy level was on E.

 

What ever happened to the church services that last less than two hours? There doesn’t seem to be any churches like that here. I’m not complaining about spending time worshipping God but unless it’s sincere worship it’s really a waste of time. Sometimes I think some churches waste a lot of time making noise so they can appear to be hyped up. I miss my church service in Gainesville.

 

But as Ruby would say, I digress. I just have to remain faithful in looking. I’ll let you know how it goes.