An Open Letter to My High School Algebra Teacher

Dear Ms. Olwell,

I couldn’t help but write this letter. I never thought I would have to but I do. First off, I’d like to apologize for skipping your class all those times. It was sixth period, after lunch, kinda hard to come back from the beach on a sunny day. You know how that is. And I’m sorry for sitting there in the front row with Dianna passing notes while blatantly ignoring your lectures.

See, I figured I was going to be a superstar. I just KNEW I was going to be a writer. I never thought algebra would have any part in my life. Oh Ms. Olwell, I was so wrong.

Why just yesterday I was at work when my business manager came to me requesting I build a table in Microsoft Word with a list of current tuition prices on it. The table compared our tuition prices with other private schools in the area. After my beautiful table was created I beamed with pride.

“Now,” she said while skimming another list with her eyes and frowning. “Take this year’s prices and compare it with last year’s prices for all of the schools. Make another column showing the percentage increase in tuition for each grade level from each school.”

I froze.

Who me?

“Sure, I can do that.” I said and rushed back to my desk.

“DIANNA!” I typed into the IM. “Do you remember how to do percentages?”

“Hell no girl. Now you know neither one of us was paying attention in Ms. Olwell class.” She typed back.

I called three people and emailed them my two lists praying that one of them would send me the answers before she came to check up on me.

My heart is beating fast and I’m trying to remember what I’m supposed to do. Why can’t I write a nice speech for her? Why can’t I write a jingle? I can write the bomb letter. Why she gotta ask me to do percentages, man? Now I look dumb.

“How’s that coming Tee?” she asks as she whisks by my desk.

“Uh, I’m working on it.” I respond tentatively.

“Any problems?” she pauses and looks back at me.

“I can do ANYTHING.” I say and smile at her. “Give me a minute, please. I’m almost done.”

I wait about five more minutes and my friend Stu calls my office.

“I just emailed it to you. You can enter it into your table now,” he says and laughs at me.

I look at it and breathe. “Thanks Stu.”

“All you gotta do for me is break me off some of that paycheck.”

I input the numbers, print it out and hand it to the business manager who simply glances at it, makes some copies and puts it into her briefcase as she heads out the door to her meeting.

Whew!

I really should’ve payed attention in class.

And you know what Ms. Olwell, you told me that my laziness would come back to haunt me. Lesson learned.

Yours Truly,

Ms. Tee