Whoo!
Ain’t nothing like finishing an article and emailing it in…It’s the most joyful feeling knowing that you beat your deadline. ~sigh~
After I finished polishing up my story, I sat down to read some stories on The Experience Project and most of them were really sad.
It seems like people just wallow in the despair and can’t get up out of it, especially when it comes to unrequited love.
I’ve been there before. Probably plenty of times, but I’ll have to tell you I don’t remember what it FEELS like anymore. It doesn’t hurt me anymore. I’m sure it hurt back then, but obviously I got over it and now…I don’t even remember the love I had for that person or persons. Believe me, the pain you’re experiencing now as you grieve a lost relationship will be SOON forgotten. It happened to me.
I don’t even remember what it feels like to love someone. The memory escapes me. I’ve met quite a few men lately and during the first conversation I can usually tell if it’s someone that I want to deal with romantically or not. Usually NOT. And that’s okay with me. I never feel like I’m missing out on anything.
Sometimes I wonder if I’m making the decision too rashly, because once I’ve made up my mind about a man, I don’t give him a second chance. But then I think, “Nahhhh…. I’m still okay without him.”
I mean, sometimes I think about having companionship, especially when I hear the stories of my friends relationships, but it’s still like wishing to see a Unicorn. If you’ve never really seen one, you can’t be too dissappointed when it doesn’t show up.
~shrugs~
I made a big decision today. My classmate has the hook-up on public housing and she said she’d push my paperwork through to get a cheap place for me and my sons. When I reviewed the list of housing options I noticed that all of the options were in my old neighborhood AKA The Projects.
Ok, so I have the option of getting my boys back and having our own home. But then I remembered the promise that I made to myself; I will never allow my sons to live in the projects. Although I want them back with me right now, it makes no sense to downgrade their living experience just to satisfy my own personal desire.
Funny…I never thought I’d feel this way. If I can’t give them a good quality living experience right now, I’ll wait until I can. It has to come sooner than later.