Having It All

My life is a miracle.

I had a bad dream last night. I won’t even repeat it because it’s not uplifting or important. But the thing that amazed me the most was my reaction to my dream.

When I woke up, remembering the images and the bad feelings, I immediately thought to myself, “That’s not true. That’s not what I want. I’m not going to think about that anymore.” I then proceeded to think about what I DO want in my life, my perfect source of income, more time with my sons, becoming a help to many people through my encouraging words.

By the time I fell asleep again I was smiling and joyful, eager to get back to dream land.

That one decision to reject the horrible feeling associated with negative thoughts is what has changed my life. I recognize that I have control over my life and my satisfaction level because I choose to ignore those things that make me feel bad. I ignore those people who say things intentionally to hurt me. I ignore those thoughts that try to convince me to compare myself to others and I just..conciously work on loving me.

This habit that I formed doesn’t feel like work anymore. It feels more like choosing laughter over crying or choosing chocolate over vanilla. Which would you choose? It’s as simple as that really.

I don’t feel like being sad or depressed today. I feel better when I think about how I want my life to be and how much love surrounds me. I feel better knowing that there is no one standing between me and my relationship with God. I feel good when I recognize that living in my dream world and actively pursuing my dreams as though they are promised to me, brings with it a sense of excitement that I have never experienced before.

I dream a lot. I dream vividly and LOUDLY. I even dream when my eyes are open. Sometimes I have to snap myself out of it. Sometimes I don’t even know I’m doing it until someone says, “Hey! Wake up!”

I can’t help that I’m such a dreamer. It’s a part of who I am and I now appreciate that. I have dreams for everyone I meet. I can give a whole scenario about their lives, how they will get better and the kind of happiness they will enjoy in the future. I can even come up with steps to advise them how to get there.

It’s as though my dreams for myself and others are taking me to a place that I have never known before. I am seeking peace and my desire to be my most authentic ME is finally coming to pass.

Through my spiritual studies I am encouraged to dream. I am challenged to let go of conventional thought patterns that have held me in bondage for years and focus on images and actions that will lead me to my very best life.

It was a little scary when I decided that I didn’t want to be a part of anyone’s religion. Instead I decided to seek my own spiritual evolution and through seeking I have found the greatest peace I have ever experienced. That’s what I always wanted. I couldn’t find it in a church. I couldn’t find it through seeking the approval of my Pastor. I found it when I let go of trying to prove myself to others and God.

It’s so wild that as children we were taught to fear God. “God is watching.” “God’s gonna get you.” “You’re going to hell if you don’t act right.”

Instead of living righteously and doing good in the world out of love for ourselves and others, we “act right” out of fear of eternal punishment. I’m not down with that anymore. I’m not going to teach that to my children. I’m not going to live in fear of a make believe hell that was crafted for the purpose of keeping order and fear in the common man. That whole thing was about control.

I am not interested in that.

I am interested in continuing to love myself and others just like Jesus did. It’s funny that even though I no longer associate myself with religion, I do still believe in Jesus and his teachings. His name is still powerful to me but now I realize that his name is powerful because I believe it to be so. Every belief that we hold sacred gains its power from our attachment to it.

Whatever is giving you peace, keep doing that. If it’s bringing more turmoil and causing you to hate the person that God made, walk away from it. You are not who they say you are. You are who you believe you are.

I wish that more people would practice the art of allowing others to be who they are and love what they love. If we would step back and just..allow others to live their lives the way they see fit instead of judging who they are and where they are by our own standards, there would be much less conflict.

No one knows “the way” because their are many “ways”. But some believe they do because their “way” works for them or maybe it’s because they are so attached to the “way” that they have been told to believe that in order to grasp the concept of anything else would mean having to think for themselves and for most, that’s a horrifying concept.

For some, holding on to what they have been told brings them peace and that’s a good thing. But just like I can’t squeeze into your size 4 jeans I can’t squeeze into your expectations for me and I don’t want to.

What I want is to be free to do the things I love to do and to reap the benefits of being the person that I am. On the real, the key to being happy is appreciation. Appreciating who you are at every moment is like the greatest high imaginable.

That is really the secret behind The Secret and all of those teaching being sold by the pound. If you learn to think of yourself as a wonderful, beautiful creation of God and believe that your very best life is NOW and FOREVER then you will never experience the blues, be disappointed with your life choices or even feel like you are lacking.

I am not lacking anything in my life. Everything I need is on my pathway and every good feeling I want to experience is already a part of my life.

I am not missing anything because I have it all right now.