I had an absolutely beautiful day even though it was gloomy outside. I woke up to phone calls from my girls and laughed and laughed.
Tamara gave the first update as I blinked my eyes to wake up completely. She told me about how her ex ( not her Baby Daddy) the fine one, is being more aggressive at getting her attention. From what she described, I couldn’t tell if she was happy about it or not, but I reminded her that it’s important to be with someone who knows what he wants. I think she’s confused…or at least she is just…unhappy with the way things have turned out. Her ex, the fine one, is a long distance love and she’s not happy with that arrangement at all so she broke it off with him.
Kim called next. She told me a story about spending time with her husband and stepdaughter. “People ask me if that’s my daughter and I say ‘no’,” she said. “Is that wrong?”
“Well, you’re not her mother but, at the same time, I remember being little and my aunt taking me and my brother and sister out to the store where people would ask her if we were her nieces and nephews and she would point to my brother and sister and say, “These two are, but she isn’t.” I know it was the truth, her brother was not my father, but I think it bothered me a little. All you have to do is say she’s my stepdaughter and I love her to pieces or something like that.”
“Yeah, you’re right,” she said. “I ain’t even trying to be like your BBDD girlfriend- trying to take the Mama place and act like she ain’t even in the picture.”
“Well, it’s not your job to worry about her, just be respectful of the child. And remember..it could have been YOU who was the single parent, treat his daughter like you would want him to treat your child if the situation was reversed.”
Then I speak to my little sister and she and I laugh easily about her boyfriend’s latest antics. By the time I’m done talking to her it’s nearly noon and I lounge around like a rich lady, planning my next articles and working on my first go round at writing a fiction novel. Blogging has gotten me comfortable with telling stories, but these stories are all based on the truth and I have no idea if I can tell a completely made up story with enough detail and flair to satisfy my own standards. I don’t play when it comes to my writing.
I’m supposed to be blogging this novel bit by bit on another website but the details haven’t been ironed out yet. I sent the first 3 installments in to the site editor and I hope that she likes them. If so, i’ll give you the link so you can follow along.
I then called my guyfriend…ahhh..you guys never got to meet him because we had our little affair back when my laptop was down. He’s…interesting. LOL!
He’s Exactly what I end up liking and the type of man that ends up hurting me and I know this and I STILL like his black ass. ~shakes head~
Of all the men I’ve ever met, including Steve, he knows how to handle me best. I mean..I have NEVER in my life been handled with such authority. He makes me melt when he talks to me…he is the perfect balance of mean and sweet.
So I called him up knowing that his number shouldn’t even be in my phone. “Hey…What’s up with you? Do I have to beg you to come see me?”
“What?” he asked, his tone rising.
“You heard me. Do I have to BEG you to come see me?” I asked again, matching his tone. I know he like it when I talk like that.
“Hollup..You don’t have to BEG for anything. I told you I’m coming to see you and I am.”
“Whatever. You play too much,” I said with a STANK tone.
“What? You want me to show you my bills so I can show you how much work I have to do? You wanna trade?”
“Whatever. I’m tired of your excuses,” I said angrily.
“Excuses?” he asked and then paused. “Tee…I miss you too.”
I melted.
“Let me call you back when I’m done,” he said. “Ok?”
“Bye,” I whispered.
~sigh~
He ain’t never called me back either. I HATE HIM! LOL!
No, he ain’t rich, he ain’t a model type dude or nothing but..he just knows how to handle me. No one else does it like he does and it got to the point where I had to erase his number from my phone so I wouldn’t call him. I just loved…being in his presence. That shit urks me so much. Ain’t no reason for me to be like this with him..it’s not like he’s the bomb in bed or anything, I don’t know what the hell it is. He just HANDLES ME SO WELL!
When I have an attitude or am frustrated or annoyed, he knows just how to calm me down or shut me up. I sit in confusion when I’m with him- or when I WAS with him. I haven’t even seen him in about a month and the last time I saw him I happened to run into him when I was dropping a package off for one of the guests on my internet show.
I know it ain’t gonna be nothing because I don’t want anything but…sometimes I think of him and smile and want that confusion back again. It was kinda exciting. He’s creative and talented and driven and a hustler and so many of the qualities I admire in men. He’s a player and a maniuplator too. All of these men who would give a lung to get my number and this dude– he act like it’s nothing. I know he’ll break my heart but maybe that’s what I want because I keep messing with him every so often. Or maybe I just like him because I know he’ll never really like me back, not in the way I believe I deserve.
Maybe I’m just bored…I don’t know.. But it’s fun..and a little entertaining. I do like his behind though..I’m just not pressed to be with him.
I know…I’ll erase his number again and a few weeks from now he’ll call me or hit me up on facebook and I’ll fall right back in again. LOL! I’m a trip. But really…I feel comfortable with it because there is no real danger of falling in love.
By 3pm I was on my way to pick up my boys. ~sigh~ Being with them is what life’s all about. We came back to my place and did homework and then ate and watched a movie. My sons are really developing their sense of humor…
I’m cuddling with my Sugarbear…he’s in front of me, my arms are around him and I’m giving him tight squeezes and biting him on the ear, pretending like I’m gonna bite it off.
“Mama,” he says.
“Yes, baby…”
“It’s..your..your beard. It’s scratching me.”
I push him off of me and I can’t stop laughing.
“Just wax Mama. Once a week. Just wax.”
I’m dieing and I can’t stop laughing and coughing.
They sure get their sense of humor from their Daddy. ~rolls eyes~
They’re asleep now. They look like angels. I am so in love with them. I just am so grateful to know them and be able to call them mine.
My baby was chosen as Student Of the Month. He was so proud and I am too… It’s funny how little things like that seem so BIG when you’re a parent.
My boys = joy.
I’m so in love.
So in love…
I had such a great day…