I lost my virginity to a tampon

WARNING~ This post contains some INTIMATE, PRIVATE, SEXUAL GENITALIA- related information that you may not want to know about me, but the story was floating around in my head so I decided to post anyway. For those of you who are still reading here goes…

I have always HATED maxi pads. Those are the grossest things ever invented. During that time of the month who wants to see all that? Yuck.

But ofcourse after getting my first period at the age of 13, I was given a bag of pads by my Mom and I used them and HATED every minute of it.

It was my senior year of highschool, I was 17 and all excited about going to my first Miami Carnival, which is a festival that celebrates Caribbean Heritage. It’s a place where everyone dresses up in these wild costumes and dance all seductively to the pulsating soca music.

My bestfriend Tamara is from Trinidad and her family had invited me to go and even participate in the masquerade competition. We got our costumes which were these white bikini’s with a belt that we superglued strands of gold beads on to make a little skirt. I thought I was too cute swinging them beads around my hips while I practiced for the big day.

Well the day came for us to get ready for the Carnival and I’m at Tamara’s house when I feel a little cramp. I go into the bathroom and I roll my eyes. My period had come early. Oh man, what do I do now? I can’t wear this bikini with a big ol nasty pad.

I open the door and call out to Tamara. She walks up stiffly. “Uh, what?”

“Tamara my period is on. What do I do?”

“Well, I guess you gotta wear a tampon today.”

“What?!”

“Look, it’s easy. I’ll talk you through it.”

I close the door and sigh.

I was a virgin and I had no clue where that thing was supposed to go.

“Look under the cabinet, you’ll see a box of my OB’s,” Tamara says through the door. “Take off the plastic and put your finger under the tampon.”

“Hell naw Tamara! I can’t do this! It’s gonna hurt!”

“It won’t hurt if you put it in right.”

I look at the tampon, which is not the kind with an applicator, it’s just a small tube shaped piece of tightly wrapped cotton.

I look down and frown.

“Tamara I don’t think there’s room down there for this,” I say and laugh.

“You can do it. Push it in,” Tamara coaches.

“It won’t go in! This ain’t gonna work. This is crazy! I don’t have a hole Prince. (my nickname for her is Prince)

“Just push it in, it won’t hurt if you push it all the way in.”

I had never even tried to do that just to pleasure myself. I was frustrated and angry at mother nature for making me do this.

“I just won’t go to the Carnival Prince,” I said. “This is crazy!”

“Girl! We paid $75 a piece to play Mass! You better get ready! I wear them all the time, you can do it.”

I find a little spot and it actually gives way.

“I think I got it, Prince.”

“Do you feel it?”

“Yeah.”

“Then push it up some more. You’re not supposed to feel it,” Tamara’s muffled voice penetrates the wooden door.

“Ok. I think it’s okay now,” I say as I wash my hands.

I open the door.

Tamara is smiling at me.

“And you thought you didn’t have a hole.” She laughs.

I give her a weird look and fasten the beaded belt over my bikini bottom.

————————————————————————————————

The really weird thing is, a few months later when I really lost my virginity to my highschool sweetheart, I bled afterwards.

I called Anna to tell her what happened and the first thing she said was, “Don’t tell your Mama.”

I don’t know about ya’ll but when I was younger my Mama would make me tell her everytime my period came on just so she could make sure that I got it every month. ~rolls eyes~

And Anna was right to advise me not to tell my Mama. My “period” was gone in a few hours.

Yeah… I don’t get it either. I really don’t.

Hope I didn’t gross you out. LOL!