Freak.
I am nowhere near as emotionally distraught as I was last night. An early morning call from a very interesting person woke me up to new possibilities.
Then I was finally able to relax my heart after 2 days of fun filled anxiety as I enjoyed the fact that one of my dreams came true.
See, I am a user of crisis hotlines. If I’m feeling to the point where my negative emotions are telling me that I am useless in this world and I begin to BELIEVE it, I have to reach out to someone and my friends, besides Mimi, aren’t good people to call. The hotline I call is an awesome resource because I am speaking with a trained counselor who has some knowledge of therapeutic models and so do I. Even though I recognize the models/techniques that they are using it is beneficial to me because then I will remember to use them on myself when I am self counseling my way out of an emotionally stressful state.
So my dream came true in that- I organized my own emotional crisis hotline for my website. Now my website offers a SERVICE which adds so much value to it. I’m not just selling a product. In fact, I don’t sell ANY products on the site, my site is about GIVING to women what I wish I had.
Last nite I appreciated my crisis counselor so much that I had to turn around and try to give it to women. I haven’t received a call yet but I’ll let you know how it goes when I do.
I am going to try to do something besides work on my website but the truth is, its all I can think about. When I’m off work in the middle of the week I try to do as much as i can with it because the weekends I know I’ll be tired.
I am so proud of what it is turning into. It’s not just some vanity site disguised to sell my products. This site is really FOR women.
I am so tired. I’ve been thinking and planning and hoping and daydreaming about (Censored) all day long. Maybe tonight should be about laughter.
Hope I find a good independent movie on Netflix.