Just What I Needed

I didn’t go to work on Friday. But even though I had the day off I had to be out of the house by 7am to go see a Dance troupe perform and write about it. It was a cool experience because I visitied one of their shows in the local elementary schools so it was wild to see Black kids mixed in with Mexican kids.

Ya’ll wanna know something about Houston? This city is almost half Mexican people. I mean..it has to be. Everything is in English and Spanish, just like in Miami. Actually, I think it’s worse here. The thing that blows me is the fact that they are all from ONE country. I’m used to seeing such diversity because of all the different carribean islands so close to Miami’s shores but most all of the Hispanic (?) people here are Mexican. I have to go see what Mexico looks like!

I ran a million errands and got lost a million times and was pissed off and frustrated but I managed to make it back to Kia’s house before dark. The door bell rang.

We both paused and looked at each other from our cozy spots on the couch where we were watching TV.

I rolled my eyes and got up. I went to the door and the UPS truck was outside. I opened the door and saw that they had left a package on the porch with my name on it.

I smiled thinking it’s my business cards. I hopped in the house and sat next to Kia telling her I was excited because my business cards were here. She was a little curious to see them I guess. But when I opened the box, it was filled with those paper, styrofoamy things that people use to pack stuff in. So I just laughed and dug my hand around in the box and my eyes grew wide as I pulled up a ……

Kia screamed as I showed it to her! She fell out laughing.

We searched the box for a clue who sent it but there was none.

Only a handfull of people know my current address so I went through my phone calling them.

“Mama? Did you send me something for Valentines Day?”

“Hell naw, Did you send ME something?”

“Guess what I got in the mail and I don’t know who sent it?”

“What?”

“A chocolate…penis.”

“A what? Girl.. It’s hard?”

“Yeah. It’s solid Mama.”

“You need to send that over here!”

Suspect 2:Ruby

“No girl….I did NOT send that to you… but you might need to send that on over to Louisiana.”

Suspect 3: Tamara

“I wish I could have have sent you a gift Tee, but I didn’t. What was it?” she asked and burst into laughter when I told her what I got. “You may need to send that on to Atlanta!”

Well that only leaves Kim. Kim wouldn’t send a gift like that she is too siddity.

I laugh and open up my sidekick to the text message screen.

“Did you send me a Valentines Day gift?” I type.

“Yeah. Did you get it? How does it taste?”

I shake my head and laugh.

JB is so stupid!