I’m In A Tugboat

Can I cry?Ok. This is a video that was forwarded to me by a friend(?) Remember The Prez (my ex imaginary boyfriend circa 2007)?I had to call Mimi on this one. My friend Mimi is the one person I call when I really need that serious word because not only is Mimi a certified counselor after receiving her MS in Mental Health Counseling a while back, but I respect her opinion, which means a lot.”Mimi!” I cried into the phone. “I don’t know what to do. Someone sent me a link of a video of The Prez on youtube and it made me so angry. I don’t know why I feel like this. I think it’s because when I see him and all he’s doing with himself I’m proud but I keep thinking, ‘I can do that! Why am I not doing that? What’s wrong with me?'””Oh, so you’re comparing yourself to him?” Mimi asked.”Yeah! And I don’t know why. I feel so jealous of him. I can do what he’s doing but instead I’m working at Denny’s. Instead I’m hungry all day. Instead I’m….” My voice trailed off as I began to cry. “I don’t get it. What am I doing wrong? Why is he doing so many great things that make me so attracted to him but I haven’t done anything to be proud of yet?””Ok Tee. I hear you. You recognize the greatness in him and that’s the greatest in you that is attracted to that. You’re called to be influential in the same way that he is but you are not there yet. You’re building your foundation. It’s only a matter of time. Look at it like this- You know how those people come out and are one hit wonders?””Yeah.””That’s because they got lucky in their field but they weren’t prepared to continue to give at that level so they fell off. You are building a firm foundation so when you DO become the woman you envision, you won’t just get one hit, you’ll have a steady ascent towards greatness.””Man, I feel like I hate him sometimes. I know that’s stupid,” I revealed. “I just..I just know that his interests and mine are aligned and it hurts to see someone being so successful when I KNOW that I could do what he does and more.””Tee, think about it. You’re both on the same journey but you’re in different boats. You’re in a tugboat and because of who he is and his father’s connections, he’s in a yacht. Ya’ll are headed in the same direction but his father has blessed him to be able to get there faster. You don’t have that, you’re doing it all on your own.””But Mimi what am I doing wrong? Why am I not there yet? I don’t get it. What if Ihad done things differently? What is it about me that’s stopping me from reaching my full potential?”Tee, that past is the past and you’re gonna get there Tee. You can’t do anything about the decisions that you have made but keep moving forward and learn from what you believe were mistakes.””I can’t do this Mimi. I feel so unsuccessful when I look at him. I don’t know why I keep comparing myself to him. I feel so dumb for doing it.””Tee, you’re almost there. Just keep being faithful to what you’re doing now. You’ll get there…””Thanks Mimi. I gotta go, I got my first table and I need to go see what they’re eating tonight…”I respect him for being the professional that he is and…Ima work through this jealousy. Damn…