Author: TPatterson

Don’t STOP Get it, Get it!

I feel sooo good!

Guess what? This is night TWO of cooking dinner for my boys and my 3 year old said to me, “Mama, this is a good dinner!”

~BEAMING~

MY BABIES LOVE ME!

MY BABIES LOOOVVVE ME!

I’m a GREAT Mama!

Man, that one compliment makes me want to cook every night. ~smile~ I never felt so appreciated…

Today at work was so chill. I didn’t stress. I didn’t do one extra assignment or write out a vision for growth for any of the departments. I just worked on my one little story all day and by the end of the day I read it and said, DAMN! This is sooo tight!

I sweat my own writing! LOL!

I was driving to work this morning and I read a bumper sticker that said, “I’m not weird, I’m gifted.”

I smiled. That’s exactly how I feel.

And what happened last night has caused me to have to repent publicly.

I lust after Shaquille O’Neal in my dreams.

Ughh! There! I said it… Now I can begin to heal.

I have these dreams about him all the time. The atmosphere changes but the theme is the same. We meet and are instantly attracted to each other, he propositions me for sex with the understanding that a LOAD of money will be handed to me. Damn Superhead! After I read that book of hers, I can’t stop having these type of fantasies.

I think it’s deeper than sex though. Cuz Shaq and I never have sex in my dreams. Something always interrupts us and I never get my money or my intimate time with him. ~shudders~ I don’t even like huge men like that.

I’m working on a TON of projects right now which has caused EXTREME happiness in my life! I even cleaned my kitchen tonight.

I know…I don’t recognize myself either.

And…. I met a guy who is very special and we are becoming good friends.

Anyway, if you want to hear me in my very first voice over, you can click HERE.

Don’t laugh at me okay? It’s my big bucked teeth that make me sound like I have a lisp. It’s hard to pronounce stuff when you have three inches of enamel sticking out of your mouth.

But I think I’m off to a great start and I got my swagger back after last week’s fiasco of not submitting excellence at work!

Protocol

I don’t understand how things always end up like this.

I know I’m not happy at my job. I don’t want to go there anymore but damn I got bills to pay. This is where the maturity must kick in and Ms. Tee realizes that she’s no special than anyone else. She’s a regular woman with ongoing bills that need to be paid regardless of how bright and talented and blessed she is.

Dreams and visions won’t pay my expensive ass rent.

I don’t know what to do but I know that I don’t want to be there anymore. But it doesn’t matter what I want, what matters is they got me. I’m stuck.

I took a risk and that shit backfired on me. Making less money, using more gas to drive, can’t even eat lunch, stressing just as much.

I think this is the first interruption in my winning streak.

And it has hit hard.

A Hidden Message

I woke up in a fright this morning, looking around wondering who touched me.

Then I felt it in my heart. The word reverberated like a frantic tennis ball in an enclosed basketball court.

I heard it loud and clear. But I don’t know what it means.

A loud whisper seemed to touch my soul as it sang:

OVERDRIVE

OVERDRIVE

OVERDRIVE

??????????????????????????????

She’s FABOO!!!

I LOVE Kimora Lee Simmons. I wanna be JUST like her when I grow up.

She’s so stunning and vibrant, smart and sassy.

I love the way she loves herself and doesn’t give a damn what anyone thinks.

She should have her own reality show, I’d watch it all day!

She’s FABULOUS and as soon as I can, I’m going to buy her book.

I can’t wait to meet that chick!

HAPPY AGAIN

Ahhh…

I had a great day at work today!

LOL!

Bi-polar?

NOT! I don’t know why ya’ll be getting all emotional with me when I go off on my tirades. Ya’ll know how I am. I’m sensitive. I’m a lit bit ‘touched’ and I freak out at a moment’s notice. And then a few hours later, I’m okay.

Get used to it.

So today was a lovely day. I did some blah work that really felt like secretary work and you all know I LOVE being a secretary.

But you know what I love even more? Setting the vision.

I love, love, LOVE to come up with an idea and sit down and develop a strategy for its success. I will do the research to see who/what the competition is and then come up with a plan to match their success and THEN beat them. I can put together all the key components, decide what people I’ll need to fit the various needs and develop the process that will make it run smoothly.

I do this for FUN!

I know, I’m such a geek.

Sometimes I used to be at work and someone would say, “I was wondering about this project. Let’s start thinking about how we will put it together.” And I’ll say excitedly, “I already did it yesterday! I had some free time and I was kinda excited about it! Let me make you a copy of the outline of my vision for success.”

GEEK!

Well, it floats my boat so don’t hate.

I just HATE when people do things inefficiently. ~rolls eyes~ I’m not one to stretch out my duties so people will think I’m busy. I just do that thing right quick and then spend the rest of my time writing my visions and goals out in detail!

he he….

I love being ME!

Inspiration for Your Day– By Ms. Tee

They’re Called Dream Killers

When I wake up in a fantastic mood like I did today I can pretty much expect that someone, somehow will try to steal my joy. My friend Kim calls them Dream Killers. They come in many different forms.

They could be the chick at work who for some reason has decided that she doesn’t like you. You haven’t dated her boyfriend, talked about her Mama or been rude to her at all, but still, she can’t even look you in the face when she talks to you. When you’re in a team meeting and its your turn to speak, you see her face scrunch up and she turns away. She tries to get as many people as she can to join her in her disgust for you. She’s on a mission to come up with reasons why she should dislike you.

I used to be very hurt because I expected to receive the same energy and respect that I put out, but then I realized something very important: she feels threatened.

In some way she has allowed you to make her feel as though she is not up to par. That’s why she criticizes all of your ideas and smirks when you are corrected by your boss. She yearns for the day when you fall on your butt because that is where she is and she wants you to join her in her misery. Don’t fall victim to her plot. Keep it happy! Keep it smiling! Keep it positive! And continue to be nice to her.

Have you ever heard the saying, “Hurting people hurt people?” It’s true. Anytime someone is rude to me, I automatically know it is because they are lacking in some area of their life. People project what they are being fed and if someone has a bad attitude it’s primarily because those close to them are not treating them well and in turn they have lost their love for themselves.

The Dream Killer can come in another form. More subtle but just as deadly. Ever reached a point of dissatisfaction in your life? A point where you KNOW you could have more but are trying to decide if you should do something about it? The Dream Killer will come along and listen to your dilemma then they will advise you that you should be content where you are. They will try to make you feel ungrateful for not being satisfied with your current position. “You’re surviving! You have food! You have a place to live! You should be happy with what you have!”

No, no, no honey…

YOU should happy with what YOU have. I’m not.

So many people are focused on surviving that they can’t even imagine the SURPLUS!

I’m not trying to live a macaroni and cheese life. I’m not just trying to SURVIVE!

I want more! In all areas of my life!

I want MORE from my career! I will not settle for a job that is not fulfilling.

I want MORE from my relationships! I will not settle for booty call status when I want the ring. I’m worth more than that.

I want MORE from my relationship with God! I love Him, but do I TRUST HIM with everything in me? Am I really modeling myself after the love He has shown me or are their alterior motives in my heart?

I want MORE!

I won’t settle for mediocre, half hearted friends who scheme, lie and steal.

I’m not interested in fellowship with a person who is waiting for someone to come and give them their next promotion.

Take a look at the people who are criticizing you. Where are they in their lives? What are they settling for? Before you take anything they say to heart ask yourself, “Are they someone I want to be like in the future?”

Most often they are not.

They’re hurting and they don’t believe in their dream. That is why they try to kill yours too.

But they can’t stop God’s plan for me.

I’m focused and all obstacles fall by the wayside.
I’m gonna get it! And I’m gonna do it RIGHT, with a sincere heart and a love for others that many do not even have for themselves.

Best of luck to you as you face the Dream Killers.

The only power they have, is the power you give them.

Another Pic
from my cousin’s friend

This time he made this up. My sons and I never took a pic like this.

Very creative!

Naked Blogging

I just came back from the store and I bought some black and milds.

When my boys are gone sometimes I find myself heading out to get them. Blacks, just like cigarettes and weed and other drugs are just time fillers.

Think about it? People who don’t have anything better to do with their time light up or smoke out. It becomes a habit because you are not focused on anything else. Idle hands….

So smoking is something to do. Something to look forward to. Something that you can control. Sometimes it gives you a little buzz but for the most part it’s causing no pleasure.

I used to smoke a lot more before I really became focused on my career. I drank a lot more too. Now I don’t because I don’t have time to veg out like that. A night of freedom is usually spent catching up with one of my MANY friends across the country, or setting plans for goals for myself.

But tonight. Tonight it’ll be me and a movie, some gin & juice and my yellow couch. I’m not doing anything tonight. Maybe chat a little if someone interesting calls.

I don’t go out partying often. You can probably tell that. I like being home. I like being alone. I’m so comfortable this way. I can take off my bra and my make up and not have to worry about my words. I can just be me. I like that so much. I can talk to God aloud. I can ask Him for understanding.

I often ask Him why He made me like this. So crazy and funky and weird. Geesh! I am definately the weirdest person I know. ~smile~

That’s okay though. Sylvia tells me that is what she loves about me.

Oh yeah, my girl Sylvia is doing well. She moved to Naples to live with her boyfriend and she is so in love. I don’t really “miss” her. I don’t have time to because I’m so busy. We still email and call each other with the exciting news. She’s a very good friend to me.

I lost track of Anna for a minute there. I called her up this morning to say Hi and she told me that she had been sick for a long time and was diagnosed with bronchitis that wouldn’t go away. She then said her doctor told her she had asthma. That really worried me. Anna NEVER stays sick. Her breathing hasn’t gotten better.

Asthma.

Damn. I have asthma too.

Man…

I better not light up those blacks.

I can’t get to where I’m going if I’m not alive.

I don’t want to risk not accomplishing my life goal.

Get Yo Mind Right

Go GATORS!!!

Lazy Saturday

Guess what I did this morning?

I wrote a children’s book.

I work with a team of amazing graphic designers and one of them suggested we collaborate on a children’s book. He said that if I wrote the story, he would illustrate it. I was sooo excited, except… I had never even considered it before. I told him I’d think about it and get back to him.

This morning I woke up and decided to give it a try. I grabbed one of my sons books and read it. Hmm… Short.. Light. Small words, easy to understand message. I sat down and wrote a little poem about my sons in less than an hour and I am so PROUD! YAY!

I think it’s going to be great! I can’t wait to see what he does with the illustrations.

I thought about going to the beach today because I took my sons two weeks ago and saw a woman taking a nap under the warm sun. I wanted to do that too! But then I remembered that this weekend is BET’s Spring Bling on Haulover Beach and I don’t really feel like fighting the crowds. I thought about going to the concert but ehh… Kanye is not gonna be there so I don’t have much motivation. Besides, it’s chilly out today. Definately not beach weather.

Tonight I’m meeting with my little sister who is now engaged to her boyfriend Daniel. Her wedding is in June and she’s all giddy with preperations for her wedding. I told her that I’d help her plan out the schedule of events so she’s on her way over to discuss her vision for the day. She’s already started marriage counseling and though she doesn’t have much money, she is trusting God to take care of everything just like He always does.

I spoke to my boy Leon today. He’s a trip times two! Whenever I talk to him I’m on this HIGH! He and his wife are so supportive of my dreams and goals. They believe in me and I’m grateful to have people like them in my life. He joked that he has a birthday coming up and he wanted to come to Miami and have the South Beach experience. I hope he comes, we’ll tear it up! He’s so much fun and REAL just like me. I think that’s why we vibe like we do.

I’m going to the movies tonight to see the new Spike Lee joint. I called everyone I know and invited them to join me but everyone is busy. ~sigh~ I guess I’ll be going by myself again. That’s okay. I’ll get as cute as I can and waltz up in there like it’s all good.

I sold another story to the Herald last week. Man, I must be getting good at this. The editor I work with is cool. We’ve never met in person but she’s easy to work with and gives me direction when I need it. I sent her my resume yesterday letting her know that I am interested in becoming a staff writer for the Herald. I know it’s hard to get in there because it’s really a BIG newspaper but I thought, hey, why not at least TRY?

I have reached out to other publications in my pursuit of more freelance work. Freelance writing has been the most rewarding career move I’ve ever made. My success is not linked to a time clock, it’s all based on my ability to generate great story ideas and follow through with great articles. I’m so motivated and I’ll share with you my most important goal this year.

By the end of this year I hope to NEVER have to punch a time clock again. I am going to leave the workforce.

If I don’t become a staff writer at the Herald, I am going to leave the work force and become a full time freelance writer. I have proposals for my book (surprise!) out for consideration and I’m working on my 2nd book now. My mind is constantly overflowing with ideas for books and articles. When I have an idea I go for it! I don’t wait around to convince myself that I can do it. I’ve realized that anything my mind can conceive is well within my capabilities. I don’t have to wait for permission to go after what I want.

God gave me this sharp mind and talent to be used. As I go forth in my hustle, I’m certain He is leading the way.

Do your thang Daddy!