Ok. So I’m all done with the editorial for tomorrow. My head has been spinning with planning the project so I didn’t get any writing done until today.
I’m learning so much at this point. The thing is, I know the site doesn’t look all that right now but you see how much it has grown. I want to make it better looking but for now the content is on point I think.
I love doing this everyday. I feel like a super powerful contributor to society.
LOL
I do question myself from time to time and that’s because I can’t question anyone else. There’s no one to ask, “Is this okay? Should I write about this?”
So I have to make the decision myself and be comfortable with the decisions I make. I also have to lead others in their writing and direct their editorial contributions. Sometimes I am nervous. you KNOW my personality. I am so not mainstream or conservative and it shows in the content I publish.
My only hope, really, is that I can cover enough topics to set people free from feeling shame about themselves or their choices and to guide others away from misery.
I want to help. I want to help myself first too.
I don’t know.
I don’t know. I’m trying my best and giving goodness to the world and this is the only way I know how to do it.
I had to turn on the air conditioner today because it is hella hot in South Florida. I was literally sweating. By the time the bill is deducted from my account I’ll be gone from here. My electric bill has been less than $20 for the past 4 months because I haven’t had to use the A/C. I can’t believe it and I’m kind of spoiled but oh well.
Tonight I’m going through my papers and things. I am going to get rid of most of my treasured memories because I can only store one box at my Mama’s house so all the letters and term papers must go.
I’m saying goodbye to my past. I don’t know what’s ahead. I am not afraid of failure but I’m still afraid of what’s to come. I feel grown. I do. I trust myself. Yet, I do wish I had a partner to bounce ideas off of and to be my anchor and to trust to be my support with everything.
I miss my sons. I haven’t seen them in 2 weeks. I won’t get them again until the weekend before my project begins, for one last hurrah before I drift into the unknown.