I’m up late feeling pretty silly right now. I just got off the phone with Ruby and that girl is wilding out up in Atlanta. I plan to go visit her for her birthday in mid August.
Life is so different in Miami. Let me tell you, before I came down here to visit last April (the visit that propelled me to move down here) I hadn’t even visited in a YEAR. I was afraid to come down because when I come for a visit I knew I was gonna wild out! I would come down for the weekend, drop my kids to my mama’s house and never come home until it was time to go. I would be drinking, smoking and hollering at men- all in an effort to get it out of my system because I knew when I got back to Gainesville it was back to the old routine- in the house every night with my boys and going to church and work and that’s it.
So I was trying to be right and I didn’t want to mess up so I stopped coming down here. I admit, I was afraid that I was gonna do the same thing once I moved here but I was so wrong.
I was afraid to leave my little safety net for fear that I wasn’t strong enough to make it on my own.
I’ve been here for four weeks now and I have not done a THING that I couldn’t write about on my blog. No need to repent or feel bad about myself. I basically do the same thing I used to do in Gainesville, except I see my family a lot more. I’m not wilding out at all and I’m still happy.
Sometimes you won’t know you have conquered a fear until you are face to face with it.
There’s nothing to fear but fear itself.