The Continuation Of My Wonderful Weekend…
But my wonderful weekend didn’t end on Thanksgiving.
No, no, no, it didn’t. It turned out that my bestfriend Anna had Friday night off from work and our other bestfriend Tamara was in Miami for the weekend so we decided that we would spend an evening together. Now, this is a BIG deal because Tamara, Anna and I had not hung out together since my graduation last year.
Before I made arrangements for our night out I had to wake up early to face the crazy crowds at the mall where I’ve been working at Express for the past two weeks. Yay! I realize that I CAN keep a secret.
Black Friday
For those who love to fight other shoppers and wild out trying to find the best deals, Black Friday is the perfect day. My feet hurt so much running behind shoppers trying to show them these damn cashmere scarves we were giving away with each purchase.
I kept getting shot down: “Um, nice scarf, but this is Florida, we don’t need those!” “Well, it’s all about accessorizing darling. Be pretty, PRETTY!” I’d say with a nice British/English or whatever you want to call it accent.
Two guys come in and they’re very, um, effiminate and I’m showing them the scarves and they’re like, “Ooh, Cashmere.” Then they touch it. “Uh, uh honey, this isn’t cashmere.” They look at the tag. “10% cashmere? Riiiigghhht.”
Ever wonder why you see the sales associates buzzing around the store so much? Guess what? THEY MAKE US DO IT! We are not allowed to just stand there and chill. We have to do a figure 8 around the store at all times. I’m running around till I get dizzy. I’m folding sweaters that don’t need folding, I’m making sure that all the hangers are exactly 1/8 of an inch apart, I’m smiling and greeting everyone and my head is hurting from being so fake.
But damn, its a paycheck and I work in the men’s section so there’s always these cuties coming in that I get to ogle. Yeah!
What we gonna do?
So, I get home and call Tamara. “You want to go out tonight?” “Yeah, let me know what we’re doing? Call Anna and see what she says.” I call Anna.
Me: Tamara says she’s down to go out. How about we all go out to dinner?- I ask sounding excited.
Anna: No. ~she laughs~ You mad?
I suck my teeth and think to myself, I know she aint about to suggest we go to that ghetto ass club called Bermudas.
Anna: Why don’t we go to Bermudas?
Me: I don’t think Tamara would want to do that, but let me check. Call you back.
I call Tamara.
Me: Girl, don’t you know Anna suggested that we go to that old ghetto club Bermudas. I know you don’t want to go there.
Tam: Yeah, it sounds like fun. Besides when was the last time we ALL went out together. Tee, it’s been almost a year.
Me: Man, I HATE that club. Last time I went, this dude burned me with his cigarette and I still have a scar. They ugly up in there!
Tam: Don’t be mad cuz your behind ran into that boy cigarette! ha, ha.. You like how I changed that around on you, didn’t you?
Me: ~sucks teeth~ I HATE ya’ll. Bye.
I call Anna and she says she has to call her other friends to see what time they’re going to meet there. In the meantime I log on to AIM and see #6 aka Derrick, is online. I’m trying to see if he has tickets to the FIU and FAMU football game that everyone is talking about. And #6 always has tickets to the events going on at his school so I’m expecting the hook-up.
He doesn’t have anymore tickets. But he says that one of his friends is throwing a get-together in Broward County. I get the info and hope my girls will at least wanna stop by before we head out to Hell aka Club Bermudas.
But God is good. Anna calls me and says, “Girl, I just heard that they are now letting 18 yr olds into Bermudas. I ain’t trying to be up in there with no lil kids. We gotta find a new spot.”
Thank you, Lord! I tell her about Derrick’s party and she says she’s down to go there instead. I’m so happy! It’s a little after 9pm and we all decide to take a nap until 11 and then wake up and get ready to go out.
Sometime between then and 11pm I develop this sniffle. At first it’s just a tickle in my throat. Then it turns into a burning sensation. As I get undressed to take my shower, it turns into a full fledged sneezing fit and it won’t stop!
Sometimes he’s just #6
I’m playing my nose like an harmonica when my cell phone rings. I hold my breath and try to control myself as I answer. It’s Derrick and he’s telling me that there are 12 guys at the get-together and only 1 girl. He says he doesn’t know if it’ll be worth the drive up to Broward. “Well, I’m already dressed and I was about to go get my girl. Hmm. 12 guys and 1 girl- shoot, if they’re cute that means more guys for us! We’ll call you when we get close.”
I go pick up Tamara and we get back to my house as Anna is pulling up. We all hop in Anna’s car and I take two quick puffs of my inhaler. I hate the winter, my asthma always acts up on me. I’m still sneezing and Anna and Tamara are like, “damn Tee, you still do that?”
I roll my eyes and blow my nose loudly in their ears. “Bltthhhhhhhhhh!”
“Oh yeah,” I tell them leaning forward in the back seat. “I forgot to mention, I never met this guy.”
They stop the music.
Tam: You’re just like my roommate. She’s always dragging me somewhere to meet some guy and when we get there I’m like, Where is he? and she’s like, I dont know he’s supposed to be wearing a red shirt. ha, ha..
Anna: So we could be on our way to get killed! Out in the middle of nowhere! Thanks Tee.
Me: You’re welcome.
When we get to Flagler I call D and tell him that we’re close. He says he’ll meet us at the gas station so we can follow him into the housing development.
Now, unlike most online hook-ups, I’m not nervous about meeting Derrick. I mean, he’s 19, an athlete and very good looking- hold up- why wasn’t I nervous? Dang, he’s just my type. Well, for some reason, I wasn’t nervous. I wasn’t trying to hook up with him. I just think he’s cool.
We’re driving through the development and our mouths drop open at all the nice cars in the neighborhood. Tamara spots a house with two BMW’s and a Jaguar parked out front. “Um,” she asks, “Can we go in there?” pointing to the house.
We park and I step out the car. Don’t laugh at me but since I was not feeling well, I put on a turtle neck sweater, some heavy jeans and some pointy toed boots. Not exactly party attire, but hey, I was cold. My friends are looking partyish in heels and girly stuff, but oh well.
Derrick steps out of his car and my first thought was, dang, he’s very light skinned. My second thought was, dang he’s short. My next thought, dang we look like we could be related or something.
I smile and give him a hug and introduce him to my friends. We all walk into this huge house and Anna says to me,” I feel like I’m the damn chaperone up in here.” She’s referring to the 21 and under crowd that we had just walked into. Lots more kids had arrived by then.
I’m all happy cuz you know I like young guys and all of these guys are so cute and so tender! Mmmmm!
But I’m all talk and no action, as usual, and D fixes us all a drink and I drink mine in like 30 seconds and then start dancing to the soca music that they are playing. I’m no dancer, so I’m looking like a geek up there but I’m just enjoying myself because I’m out with my girls and when you’re with your girls, nothing matters except having fun with them.
So it’s getting stuffy in there and me and my girls step outside onto the patio area. Now this is a nice house, we all agree. We were overlooking a kidney shaped pool and heated jacuzzi that had lights flashing that turned the water different colors. It turns out that the guy who is throwing the party is upstairs sick and his parents are out of town. Aww.. how cute.
Anna is acting all ghetto talking about,” Damn one day Ima be living like this. For real, for real. This shit is nice! Damn, that water look good as hell! Ima bout to dive in that mutha.”
I’m like damn Anna just let everybody know we from the hood where the only pool we see are the ones we get from Walmart and fill up with city water in the front yard so the kids can play. She acting all goo-goo ova the house and I’m just laughing at her silly behind.
Conversation is all a blur and before I know it we’re sitting with our feet in the jacuzzi and two guys are walking over to us handing us t-shirts. We all look at each other and say, What the hell? These lil boys ain’t gonna do nothing. We take off our clothes and put on the white tees and hop in the jacuzzi. The steam is so nice. The jet streams are making out booties itch but the water feels absolutely lovely. My nasal passages are now all clear.
The only thing wrong was this fly buzzing around us the whole night. I think his name was Charlie or something I don’t know. All I know is he was actin like a jit the whole night. And me, as usual playing the Mama role, told him, “If you ever want to make a move on a woman, don’t ask, just do it.” Anna agreed. “If a man asks for a kiss from me, he won’t get it.” “But if he just goes for it, it’s like damn, he got heart,” Tamara adds.
We chill in the jacuzzi for about 30 minutes while all these flies buzz around talking smack. Let’s see, you got 3 half-naked women in the jacuzzi, What would you do if you were a guy? Ahh…Innocence. That’s why I like young guys. They don’t know what to do. You can mold them into what you want.
It’s not like we wanted them to try to hit on us or anything, but damn, instead of sitting by talking bout, “What ya’ll workin with?” “What ya’ll gonna do?” At least just join us and let’s enjoy some conversation. With the exception of one, they were all sitting in chairs, just…looking.
Where was Derrick this whole time? I think he came out once and went back in. He was playing the host for the party and was a very good one I might add.
Overall I give the party an A, cuz they had good music, cute guys and Derrick was an excellent host.
Ya’ll don’t need to know where we went after the party, but let’s just say I didn’t get home until 6am.
Riding Around
So I slept until 2:30 the next day. I woke up with a migraine from my teeth grinding all night. Tamara woke me up reminding me that I was supposed to take her and her mother out to run errands.
I get up and get dressed and tell my lil sis to get ready too. She had already asked me to take her to Best Buy so I figured we could do all that while we’re out.
We run like a million errands and while my sis is trading in her Ipod for another one, Tamara’s mother, Tamara and I enjoy nice pedicures and massages.
Baby Daddy Drama
It’s already dark when we get home and I’m pooped, but ofcourse Tamara and I make plans to go out again that evening. As soon as I walk in my Mama says, “Your baby daddy been calling you all day. He said call him as soon as you get in.”
Like an IDIOT I call him. Our conversation goes like this:
Him: Hey, I have to go to church early in the morning so I may have to bring the boys back early. (church? yeah right)
Me: NO! You said you were keeping them until Sunday at noon. I have plans. I’m not gonna change them.
Him: Your Mama’s home. She can keep them!
Me: NO! You keep them! You already agreed!
Him: Fuck this. I’ll be there in 15 minutes.
He hangs up in my face.
I start crying. I’m so pissed off. I try not to write too much negative stuff about my baby daddy cuz honestly he’s not a bad baby daddy he just treats me like I’m garbage. And honestly, I like to read my archives and I dont want to read a bunch of entries where I’m crying over how he’s being rude to me.
But this nicca is an ASSHOLE to me! He constantly tries to demean me by calling me names an telling me I’m a horrible mother. But this time, I decide to stand up for myself, cuz I usually don’t. And he’s totally going against our agreement. He thinks he can just decide he doesnt want to keep them and just drop them on me. He did the same thing LAST TIME he was here!
I’m seething. I’m sitting in my car, waiting for him to pull up. As promised he pulls up and gets out. I get out to and walk up to him.
“You think you gonna keep disrespecting me like this? I told you not to bring them here. I told you I had plans!”
“Man, fuck your plans I can do this cuz you don’t even take good care of them anyway! Look at you, all dressed up. You been gone all day! You can stay in the house!”
“You know what nicca, you gonna pay for this! You’re gonna pay!”
“Yeah, I know it. All you think about is money. You’re after my money, you’re after me. But whatver!”
“Naw, nicca I ain’t talkin about money, I’m talking about KARMA! You’re gonna get yours.”
I usher my boys, who are now crying, into the house. Before I can close the door, I feel something pop me in the back of my head. This nicca done threw something at me! I turn around and pick up two shirts on hangers. I throw them back on the ground and slam the door.
My Mama is like: Don’t worry Tee, go out I’ll take care of them. But I don’t want to go out. I want to kick his butt! I head straight to the police station to press charges on his ass for battery. but as I’m sitting talking to the officer, I change my mind. Naw, I ain’t gonna go this route, I got another trick up my sleeve for his behind.
So I call Tamara and tell her to get dressed cuz I’m coming to pick her up.
South Beach Baby!
I’m calmed down as I’m riding down 17th ave to her house. I decide that this nicca is NOT worth me staying inside dwelling on his dumb behind. I am going out. I am going to have a good time.
Tamara and I leave her house without a destination in mind. I suggest going to South Beach cuz the only time i had ever been there was with my baby daddy when we were dating and it’s a WHOLE different experience when you’re not with your girl.
We get to South Beach and we can tell it’s a slow night cuz it’s drizzling. Tamara and I are driving around and smiling at all of the beautiful architecture, bright lights and interesting looking people. There are tons of clubs on South Beach so we park and just walk the strip, talking looking at people.
We are accosted by several party promoters who put bands around our wrists promising us free admission and free drinks all night if we go to their club. Free drinks? No cover? Sounds good to me.
We walk into this club called Club Red. We immediately head to the bar to get a free drink. When we walk away I almost run into these two white girls making out on the dance floor. After we’re finished with our drink we leave and go into another club. We didn’t have to wait in line, as soon as the doorman saw us he told everyone to step aside and let us in for FREE! I LOVE being a girl!
This club is called Club Empire. And I think it was made just for me. All my dreams came true as I surveyed the crowd. It was as if someone said, Hmm, what kind of man does Tee like to look at? Ok, let’s clone him and fill this club up with them.
I was in CHICO HEAVEN! There they were, all clean cut and dressed so precisely. I thought I was going to faint. Ofcourse you can’t go anywhere with Tamara, AKA the man magnet cuz no one is gonna pay any attention to you. That chick could be wearing a garbage bag and STILL get more play than me. But I ain’t mad, I’m just laughing as she shoos them away.
The one thing I am getting compliments on all night long is my hair. One guy actually grabs me, “Ven aqui Mami! (Come here Mama). I stop, cuz he’s damn cute. He runs his hand over my head. “So Sexy,” he drools. “So sexy!”
I’m baldheaded and they love it!
After feasting my eyes on all of the sexy men I’m ready to go and Tamara is down for whatever and we leave to walk the strip some more. I think we went to about five clubs that night. They’re all storefront clubs so they’re side by side and packed with people of all colors.
The last club we went into was the icing on the cake. It was called Club Deep. The dance floor was actually sitting on top of an aquarium, so as you’re dancing you look down and see all these fish swimming around.
They were playing all the old jams from my high school days. I’m talking bout all the old school Miami bass! I was in heaven and shaking what my mama gave me all night long! I was loooose!
We left South Beach at about 2:30 am and I dropped Tamara off and went home to cuddle with my sons and deal with this painful tootache that I have.
I’m feeling good and I’m so glad that I got to hang out with my girls this weekend.
