I downloaded the new browser called Google Chrome and it’s fast! I was becoming annoyed with IE. See.. there’s.always a solution waiting to remedy any problem.
I had such a beautiful day today. I’m so unorganized. Seriously. Besides being an absolute mess…I also misplace things a lot. I am forgetful too with little things like by the time the new IE browser would load, I would have already forgotten what website I was going to. LOL!
I’m feeling so relaxed right now and so at peace with life. Today my sister called me and we were chatting away and she said, “I wish you and your BBDD would have the type of relationship where he would look out for you cuz he knows you’re not straight. Like, he would give the boys some money and say, ‘Here, give this to your Mama so ya’ll can go out to eat.’ And ya’ll could hang out with the boys together and he would honor you and show them how to treat women.”
I sighed. I never imagined that. But the crazy thing is…at least he’s not CRAZY! I hear so many horror stories of men and women who have to HIDe from their exes because they are being stalked and harrassed. Yeah…I guess his nasty emails were a form of harrassment but at least I’m not in danger. He tries to attack my spirit with insults but they don’t affect me anymore. I really don’t care what he thinks.
I’m so glad I have Tamara to play the “Wouldn’t it be nice if…” game with. She called me today and started it out saying, “Wouldn’t it be nice if XYZ University called me and offered me the job?”
And I replied with, “Wouldn’t it be nice if they called and you started the new job right after your 30th birthday?”
Playing that game puts you in such a good mood! And we always imagine things that we REALLY want to happen…but sometimes don’t believe could happen. Like I said, “Wouldn’t it be nice if I met Kanye and he turned out to be a great person and he adored me and I adored him and we really connected like I thought we would?”
So many people prepare for the worst to happen, but I don’t. Anymore.
I decided to stop fighting what is…and start allowing more.
I’m gonna let go of a few things and just see where the wind takes me.
Living like this is rough on my friends, my sister is constantly telling me to stop and plan and wait until I see the full manifestation before I make a move but if I waited until things showed up before I believed in them, I have no idea where I’d be.
See I believe in making room for progress and not just waiting for it to come. I have told my roommates I am leaving by the end of April and I believe I have made room for a miracle to come into my life so that I can have a better place for me and my sons.
Wouldn’t it be nice if I got a hug tonight? ~smile~ I know it’s not gonna happen since I have no one to love me in my life right now..but just imagining it kinda fills that void a little. I like that.
Wouldn’t it be nice if I came across a great website that had oodles of inspirational information that encouraged me to keep going?
Wouldn’t it be nice if….
You go ahead and fill in the blanks. I’m gonna give google one more go…just to see if one of my fantasies will come true tonight.
Blessings…