On DEEP

I swear, I can’t make a friend without becoming attracted to them. What’s up with that? I just meet so many men that I don’t like so now that I met one that I do vibe with, all the others seem like cold appetizers.

I was just thinking of the person I was and the situation I was in when I met him. I think we met late last year but since then I’ve changed a little bit. I think he makes me see myself. Because he has been around so long he has seen all sides of me, well, except the sexual side. He and I never exchange sexual energy at all. There is no physical attraction there. When he is looking cute I tell him but when I am looking cute he never says a thing. I don’t know why he does that, all of his friends will compliment me.

He knows a lot about eastern philosophies. He says he is a student of life. Sometimes I think he is fucking with my head but then I’ll hear him in my mind saying, “No Negative On Any Level,” his half assed imitation of a man on a guided meditation audio we listened to one night. But when he says that, I shut that negative shit off.

Everything that happens, happens for my good. There are no mistakes. I have to enjoy the journey and trust that whatever comes, it is only moving me inthe direction of where I need to be to realize my dreams.

But even as DEEP and I discuss our dreams, we often speak about getting rid of our desires. Like…if we focused only on achieving peace in our hearts and recognizing our oneness with God, then we won’t need to be so avid in our pursuit of financial gains. When you feel rich and know your relationship to God then you will have whatever you want. All you will have to do is select it. I accept this as my Universal Truth and I am trying so hard to make it real in my life.

I’ve been studying everything I can about metaphysics and manifestation. What I’ve learned so far, that I actually learned last year, is that it’s all about vibrations, energy vibrations. The way they explain it is, if you feel a certain way you are sending out those sad vibrations and only more sad things will come your way, due to the magnetic pull of the vibrations desperately searching for vibrations on the same wave.

I say..when you’re miserable, you look at life through miserable eyes. You won’t see a blessing (opportunity) because you’re so focused on what’s wrong. When you’re always thinking about what’s wrong, you’re only going to go deeper and deeper into the hole. Cover that hole up. Put some concrete on it.

The next time you find yourself imagining the worst, shut it down! Say STOP! Say it out loud if you have to.

STOP it and then SWITCH it. What’s the BEST that could happen?

Force yourself to come up with 3 positive things that could happen. Soon you’ll make it into a game. You’ll start daring to speak crazy dreams out loud while laughing at yourself. And one day…you’re going to wake up and realize that it all came true.

Yeah…Like I was saying. You can have whatever you like. You have to accept that its there and you have to be bold enough to make room to receive it.

I love it!

Regardless of whatever….I appreciate having DEEP in my life. For the first time in my life, a man is interested in having consistent contact with me and he is not attracted to me in any way and he does not want ANYTHING from me.

And it’s been MONTHS and we’re still talking….

This is some crazy shit.

I have a question…when is it ever a good time to leave well enough so you can have more?