Dilemma, Dilemma….

I don’t know what to do.

I have this job offer, well, it’s sort of a job offer. It’s a company that I made contact with that works through Second Life and they want me to come on and help out with their virtual news division. While the company is a start-up and has not received any capital funding yet, the amount of money they offered me, “contingent upon receiving funding” is a really good amount of money, in REAL LIFE money.

It’s kinda what I asked for.. a creative opportunity to come my way that will utilize my gifts of writing, management and being a visionary. And it will allow me to work from home because the company is based in New York. Well, considering that they do receive funding. ~crossing my fingers for them~

The concept of this business is beautiful and I really see it going far…

But the only thing is.. I hate news.

I hate watching the news. I hate writing news stories. I hate that it’s so boring.

I’ve written about five stories for their news division so far and I’ve loathed writing each and every one of them. I’m not writing anymore news stories. I told them that. I just don’t like doing that.

I’m trying to relax and allow the universe to guide me, but I get this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomache when I think about it, but that’s only because it’s NEWS and I hate news.

On the flip side, I know I’ll do a good job. I do a good job at everything I try to do, so I know I’ll be an asset to their company. But I don’t know why I have this hurting feeling in my heart, this feeling that’s telling me don’t do it.

But I can’t turn down a job offer, especially THIS one because its so close to what I really want to do and it directly aligns with my current career as a journalist.

And the thing is I really do want to help them realize their dream because I think it’s an important and phenomenal addition to the field of journalism.

But they want me to start working NOW, before they can pay me, which I don’t mind, it’s just…I don’t want to commit to a project and then have to quit it when something I really like comes along.

Kim says I have to learn to say No, Which I really have a hard time doing since I LOVE helping people accomplish their dreams.

I don’t know what to do.

  1. Take this job, work it hard and hope that it turns into something that I’ll enjoy.
  2. Take this job and focus on the fact that it’s bringing something unique to my journalism portfolio.
  3. Leave this opportunity because it doesn’t get me to where I am trying to go; I never wanted to do news and even if I take this, I won’t ever do news again if I leave it.
  4. Focus on receiving the money and forget about what I want.
  5. Help them achieve their dream and worry about my own later.
  6. Fuck everybody and only do what makes me happy and will add to my long term career goals.

I don’t know. I feel bad about it.

I could add so much to thier business, but at the same time, I won’t enjoy myself at all.

I don’t know what to do.